What Kind of Unglued am I?–Unglued Bible Study Chapter 4

Hello Divas!  Is is just me or are there just TONS of opportunities to come unglued these days?  We had a great discussion on last Saturday talking about the labels that other people place on us or that we place on ourselves.

I just love the way Lysa Terkerust (the author of our study) summed it all up:  “God doesn’t allow the unglued moments of our lives to happen so we’ll label ourselves and stay stuck.  He allows the unglued moments to make us aware of the chiseling that needs to be done.”  AMEN!

At the end of our time together, Lysa challenged us to practice pausing and whispering “Let God Chisel” before reacting to difficult situations.  How is that working out for you?

In chapter 4, Lysa discussed the ways we come unglued. We either 1) explode  by loudly or forcefully expressing our feelings or 2) stuff everything deep down inside and pretend to be “fine”.  Lysa went on to describe actual subcategories of exploding and stuffing.

The four categories of unglued reactions are:

  • Exploders who shame themselves (Yell first, feel horrible later)
  • Exploders who blame others (Yell and then blame the other person for your behavior)
  • Stuffers who build barriers (Say everything is fine but then get distant)
  • Stuffers who collect retaliation rocks ( Silent record keeping of every wrong doing only to be brought up later)

Call me crazy but depending on my audience, I can react in all of these ways.  Don’t let someone close to me like my husband or children dance on one of my nerves, I can explode and blame, stuff and build a barrier while collecting my retaliation rocks, and shame myself for it ALL  in record time.

The point is to have something Lysa calls “Soul Integrity”.  “Soul Integrity is honesty that is godly.  Soul Integrity brings balance to unglued situations.  It makes us true peacemakers–people who aren’t stuffing or exploding but rather honestly demonstrating what they are experiencing in a godly manner.

A passage in the book of James speaks about Soul Integrity:

James 3: 13-15, 17

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. 14 But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. 15 Such “wisdom” does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic….But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

How can you respond in ways that are: considerate, submissive, impartial, full of mercy and sincere this week?

Homework:  Read Chapters 4, 5 and 6 before our next study time together (October 20, 2012)

Five Minute Friday-WIDE

Five Minute FridayEvery Friday, Lisa Jo Baker hosts a blog link up called Five Minute Fridays. She provides a word prompt and then participants are to set their timers for five minutes and then write until the timer goes off. The word for today is WIDE. Happy Friday Divas and here goes:

I don’t know about y’all, but on Monday morning it seems like the distance to Friday is not only long but WIDE and treacherous.  When I finally make it to Wednesday, (HUMP-DAY), I can see the weekend flickering in the distance and what seemed so WIDE and long appears to be much closer than half-way there.  I am sure dancing and sweating off the cares of the week with all of you fabulous Divas really helps to change my perception. 

Perception is a funny thing isn’t it?  There is always a WIDE array of opinions on a particular subject.   Even twins don’t always see an identical circumstance in the same way.  Another crazy thing about perception is that it can change–sometimes quickly at other times it may take a lifetime.   It has always been said that it is a woman’s prerogative to change her mind. 

When we were cooling down on Wednesday, I was drenched in sweat and already feeling better from just the crazy energy you gals gave me in class.  Then, I listened and worshiped to our new cool down song, Redeemed by Big Daddy Weave.  God changed my mind. 

Just after the first verse, I thought I might burst into tears:

Seems like all I could see was the struggle
Haunted by ghosts that lived in my past
Bound up in shackles of all my failures
Wondering how long is this gonna last

Wow, that has been me for the last couple of weeks.  Little things have kept coming up and all I could see was a WIDE valley of stuff I screwed up and worry about the future.

Then next part of the verse and chorus almost literally knocked me off my feet:

Then You look at this prisoner and say to me “son
Stop fighting a fight it’s already been won”

I am redeemed, You set me free
So I’ll shake off these heavy chains
Wipe away every stain, now I’m not who I used to be
I am redeemed, I’m redeemed

I am NOT who I used to be.  I AM REDEEMED and the battle IS NOT MINE!!!  Thank you God for changing my perception right there on that stage standing in front of a WIDE variety of women from all different cultures, backgrounds and walks of life. 

Dear God,

May our eyes, hearts and ears remain WIDE OPEN so that we can see, feel and hear what YOU are doing.

Psalm 18:35-36

You have given me your shield of victory. Your right hand supports me; your help has made me great.  You have made a wide path for my feet to keep them from slipping. 

Click HERE if you cannot see the embedded video.

Don’t miss Soulful Saturday and our new bible Study (UNGLUED) on Saturday September 21, 2012! Visit our Meetup for Details!